Some gags from Joyce Stirling’s columns, from the early 1960s in Brisbane…

On returning home after her operation was cancelled because she had the flu: Neighbours who had waved me off the previous afternoon stared in surprise. This was the most spectacular recovery from an operation they had seen in a long time. They certainly did get you up quickly these days.

On Memos:

I am forever writing memos to myself. The other day when asked to produce a certain document for perusal by an important Government official, I drew out a paper from my briefcase and handed it across the table.

The eyebrows of the important Government official shot up and he handed the paper back to me.

‘I think there has been some mistake,’ he said.

I had a look. The paper read: Butter, Cheese, Floor polish, Bladebone, Stamps, Speak to rubbish man, Write column.

On hosing the garden: I sometimes wonder if I were dying of thirst if they would do as much for me;  but we’ll let that pass.

On buying records:

Finally I should like to tell you about the woman who was in the soundproof booth next to the one I was occupying in a city Record Bar recently.

Poking her head round the wall of my cubicle she held up two records for my inspection, one ballet, the other pop. ‘Which shall I give my friend for her birthday?’ she asked. ‘Which do you think has the prettiest cover?’

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