Some more gags from Boys of Our Empire, Volume 1, 1901, an anthology of an Edwardian one penny magazine for boys…

“Uncle John,” remarked Dick, “is the finest after-dinner speaker I ever knew.”

“Why,“ said his friend, with some astonishment, “I never heard he had any ability in that direction at all.”

“Well, he has. I’ve dined with him several times at various places, and after dinner he always says, ‘That’s all right, my boy. I’ll pay for it.’ “

Where the learned Fail

A young pastor in a college town was embarrassed by the thought of criticism in his cultivated congregation. He sought counsel from his father, an old and wise itinerant, saying: “Father, I am hampered in my ministry in the pulpit I am now serving. If I cite anything from geology, there is Professor A., teacher of the science, right before me. If I use an illustration in Roman mythology, then there is Professor B. ready to trip me up for any little inaccuracy. If I instance something in English literature that pleases me, I am cowed by the presence of the learned man who teaches that branch. What shall I do?”

The sagacious old man replied: “Do not be discouraged. Preach the simple Gospel – they probably know very little of that.”

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